Day 27: A Problem I've Had

Oh boy, here we go, you ready for a rant? I don't know how any of this will sound written out as opposed to spoken (probably stuck up and bitter) so be prepared.

The theme song for this entry:

Since fourth grade, I've had boy related drama. Someone somewhere didn't like that I liked who I liked, or didn't want me to be with who I was with for their own selfish reasons. And usually I didn't hear anything about it until I was suddenly being snubbed because they thought I was selfish. I fully admit that I had little consideration for other peoples feelings when it came to "who I liked," but the friends I had acted like I was supposed to take some kind of survey and make sure everyone was okay with me even looking at a boy and thinking about liking him. I thought this was ridiculous then and it's even more ridiculous now. I don't believe in friendship rules. I believe friendship means being happy your friend is happy, warning them if they're doing something you disapprove of but being there for them anyway.

My friends had a bunch of stupid sayings and rules. "Chicks before dicks" just like "bros before hos." Don't date ex boyfriends of your friends. My mom had all kinds of advice, like "boys come and go, but friends last forever." Bull.shit. My female friends and I were all insane. We were boy crazy and smack in the middle of puberty. And let me tell you something, it's not just boys that go and friends that stay. Everyone goes. The important ones hang on, male or female, and they're worth hanging on to. So all of the problems I had with my friends about boys were so petty and they so don't matter now, but it was such a big fucking deal back then. My friends would literally ignore me when they decided I was a bitch for not considering them in all of my decisions. This was middle school. It happened. I worked it out, I apologized, took the credit, smoothed things over. Guess what? I'm not friends with any of them anymore. So it doesn't mean shit. And that's okay.

But you know what's absolute bullshit? When it happens after middle school; after High School even. I was asking for it, really, going after the one guy with the crazy "ex" forever stuck in middle school mentality, friendship rules and all. You might know who I'm talking about, so just go with it. I knew the reaction I was going to get, but there was no apologizing, no reasoning with this girl. I got hateful voicemails, I got hateful comments from her friends (who didn't know me, they were just following the leader like all immature people do) and despite blocking accounts, she still finds me. She still tells lies about me. "I saw her at the mall and she said I was fat." Lie, never happened. And what makes me sick is she has never apologized, never taken credit or been graceful about it. She tries to say what I'm saying now, like she's the victim. Hey, I'm not the one who wouldn't accept when someone didn't love me to the point of driving by their house or stalking their girlfriends. It pisses me off. Obviously I didn't need this person in my life, but she didn't let me forget how much I pissed her off. She even went as far as egging my car. I'm just so tired of her hypocrisy I can't even begin to describe it. I never fought back, never went out of my way to make her mad. Why bother? She would only blow it out of proportion and point more fingers, and it would only be sinking to her level.

So I've never bothered trying to smooth things over with her again, because she's too crazy. She'd either laugh in my face or pretend to be nice to me again so she could laugh behind my back. I was friends with her, and I know how she is. It's just not worth it, I quit. It's not a big loss.

But there's just always gonna be someone who has a problem with who I'm dating, I guess. Whatever, you know? I'm happy, so I don't care.

Entiendes?