A Father's Day Post

Graduation night, 2009

   Growing up I had kind of a distant relationship with my dad. My parents divorced when I was about five, right around the time my brother was born and I don't remember much about it, but I do remember moving to Prescott. I went to Phoenix, where my dad moved, every weekend until I hit my teens. I missed a lot of slumber parties and birthday parties and I'd always have to say: "I can't, I have to go to my dad's."
    But he did so much for me that my mom just wasn't able to do and I didn't realize it growing up. I was even angry that he didn't do enough when I was fourteen (The Year I Was Angry About Everything) because he wasn't all there emotionally in my eyes. He watched a lot of sports. But he always helped me with my math homework and always bought me things I asked for during the holidays.
   When I got older, he made it possible for me to start college. If it weren't for him, I'd probably have no education past high school. He pressured me, and even though it bothered me sometimes I'm so happy I have two years of college under my belt because of him. Just about any time I talk to him he asks me about going back to school. Right now since I don't know where I'll be at the end of the year, it's likely I'll wait, but I know I want to go back when we're in a more permanent place.
   He also paid for just about the entire wedding. He helped me pick my wedding dress online and was there the day it came and I made sure it fit. I was living with him by then, going to school in Phoenix and having no idea what the future would be like. He drove me around to some far away stores to find things to go with my dress, we went to movies, stayed up watching tv shows and I really got used to being there. I finally got to know him and he made more sense. In turn, I saw traits in myself I never knew I got from him.
   I never thought I'd miss living in Phoenix. I've been in Oklahoma about five months now and I keep missing all these holidays that I was always there for and it just feels so weird. Usually I'd be in Phoenix with my brother and my dad would take us out somewhere.
   I just can't live this far away from family forever. Some families are spread out over the country and hardly ever see each other except for Christmas. But my immediate family is in Arizona, or very close to it. I feel like we might end up in Phoenix one day.