Oh Yeah This Blogger Thing (A Lazy Update)

Once I got back to Oklahoma you may or may not be able to understand the fact that I had no urge to use the internet. For the few days I had before going back to work I sat in a puddle of self pity, lazily posting on instagram and hardly leaving my couch. (Although I have at least attempted to get back to exercising, more on that later.)
And of course once I was back to work blogging just wasn't appealing at all. It was a busy week back; I brought home over $200 which was undoubtedly nice. Oklahoma drained me pretty hard and I haven't been able to get away from my own thoughts, but work keeps me busy and when I'm not stressing about it I know it's good for me.



My favorite bits of being home can mostly be represented by the pictures I threw up on Instagram. From best friend reunions to giant smoothies from Robeks, I was pretty obnoxious about every little thing.

I turned 22; rewarded myself with lots of fruit and a second new tattoo during my trip. (Also more on those later.)

  I learned how to shoot all of these guns with my cousins. Having never shot before it was a pretty eye opening experience, and also pretty fun. Turns out I enjoy revolvers and shotguns, and will probably end up buying my own someday soon.

  We enjoyed a 50's themed party thrown by Michael's parents (during which Michael looked adorable, winning the costume contest). I finally met the new addition to the family and spent a lot of time playing Cards Against Humanity.
   There was usually something going on just about every day, even if it was just having dinner with family or being lazy with friends. I did however spend a day on the Cook's couch after a very sick night I blame on some bad fish. At least I wasn't sick in Oklahoma by myself with no comforts of home.
  Anyway, after all that it's been a real let down being back "home" again, trying to adjust to once again having little to no social life outside of work where all I do is wait for Buffy comics to come in the mail and play Fire Emblem on my 3DS like it's the only (but really really good) game in the world.
  I may make separate posts about my new tattoos and review some games for fun, we'll see.

Some Supai Photo Favorites/Home Again

  As always, Supai was a worthwhile experience. I took over 600 photos, and that was before I dropped my five year old camera in the water. Twice. I was just insanely photo happy and even though I took a lot of stereotypical photos that everyone takes, they're still my photos and I'm really happy with how a lot of them came out.
  Being exhausted from hiking helped me get the best sleep I've had in weeks. I was so stressed working all the time and worrying about our trip I was incredibly sleep deprived. I was responsible for my friend Justin's first experience with Nutella; we all ate a ton down there. It was great to slow down, be in nature and play games with friends and family.
  It's just great to be back in general, but I have this constant feeling like I need to be up moving around while I'm in town. Like must. keep. having. fun. I have to remember I'm here for a while. We've mostly just been hitting up our favorite restaurants. It's all about the food. Although today I bought myself a new phone case and some shorts because the ones I brought with me are ancient, so I threw them out. Felt good.
  I know it's going to be hard to go home, so I'm just trying to enjoy the now!

Crunch Time

Packing for what is just a few days short of a month isn't easy, especially when you're also going camping, and therefore need twice the stuff. This trip has jumped on us out of nowhere. One day it was two weeks away, suddenly we're leaving in two days.
Last week was probably one of the worst I've had in a very long time. Since high school, since Michael left for boot camp. It was a combination of the two. I worked every single day without a day off for two weeks. I was sleep deprived and I couldn't seem to eat right, and my anxiety was so high I couldn't sleep right despite being so tired. Adrenaline kept me awake to work and simultaneously try to enjoy myself afterwards.
My curse kicked in and I made a friend just as they were leaving, so on top of being physically ill I was (and am) pretty damn sad. I've been doing my best to keep in touch but who knows what'll happen. There's nothing like those people who come into your life for a short time. It's heartbreaking but also enriching. Just imagine me sighing and shaking my head. Life, man.
We had to order a seat belt last minute online, and thankfully it arrived today. We have to clean up the house a bit as well as the car, buy a few more things and figure out how everything will fit in our little car. I've packed most of my clothes but there are some non-clothing items I have to wait to pack. Since I've saved nearly everything (and I mean, I spent very little on food and gas) I've made at work, I have over $1300.
So...we're kinda ready. I'm sure we'll be okay. I'm just trying not to panic!

Happy May!

  Two weeks till our trip! I'm feeling kind of overwhelmed with the stuff we still need to do. My passenger seatbelt stopped working properly a while ago and we have to find a part soon! I don't particularly want to take a super long road trip without a seatbelt. That's pretty important. We'll be doing some of our Supai food shopping here, but some at home. I just hope we'll be ready! There's so much we have to pack and then figure out how it's all going to fit in the trunk of our car.
  I'm just so happy it's May! This month is going to be great. And most of June, too! June is my month. It feels like my birthday lasts the whole time. So ready!
  Just for fun, I thought I'd do a little more of that Alphabet Challenge I occasionally post. Last time I just did R, but I think I'll knock out a few letters this time.

S – School

91. If you are still in school, what grade will you be going into? I'm not in school right now, but I miss it.
92. When will you graduate high school/college? I graduated high school about four years ago now, which is crazy. Time flies. Not sure when I'll finally accomplish something in college. Life has taken me elsewhere.
93. After high school, what did you do/are you planning to do? Dated a boy, married him and followed him to Oklahoma. Loving marriage, not loving Oklahoma.
94. Do you like or hate school? What do you like/hate about it? I kinda love it. Especially after high school, but even then and before then I was pretty good at it. I always get at least one really nice teacher that likes me and lets me do extra things/get things done my way. I just hated all the crazy rules of high school, like dress codes, PDA, no mp3 players etc
95. Have you ever been suspended, expelled, or dropped out of school? I stopped going to college after my fifth semester. It wasn't a drop out but I wish I was on track and graduating something like some other people I know. Oh well, can't compare yourself to everyone.

T – Temptation

96. Have you ever done something wrong, knowing it was wrong, because something inside of you said it was okay? Most likely. Yeah, probably lots of things.
97. Has anyone ever pressured you to smoke or drink? Did you do it? Welcome to my freshmen year of high school. And then I smoked cigarettes for six years.
98. Did you ever cheat on someone? Why did you do it? I kissed somebody else during a game of spin the bottle, since I figured it was just a game and didn't matter. The person I was dating thought otherwise for some reason. I was fourteen, also. Other than that I'm incredibly loyal.
99. Did you ever want to do something sexual with someone you didn’t really know or love? What did you end up doing? I have plenty of fantasies of good looking strangers but honestly I'm too terrified of people I don't know to ever really do anything like that. So it's usually absolutely nothing.
100. Do you give in to temptation easily, or are you more independent and strong willed? I tend to give in to food cravings a lot :/

U – Unique

102. Do you do a lot of things because your friends are doing it? Not really. If everyone is doing it sometimes I'm the one who's bored and wants to do something else.
103. Do you follow trends, wear whatever you want, or wear really unique pieces? I just wear whatever, sometimes pieces of trends but I'm too poor to keep buying and keep up with everyone. It doesn't matter.
104. Do you give in easily to peer pressure? Do you do things such as smoke, drink, or have casual sex? Newp. I drink if I want, I quit smoking, and casual sex has always been out of the question. We're either a committed couple or I'm not givin' it up.
105. What makes you different from people your age? I don't want to pop out baby after baby and my husband and I have a great relationship. Compared to everyone around me, I'm a freak. I also just seem to have more common sense and care more than a lot of people my age.

V – Value

106. What’s the most expensive thing in your room? I guess the TV my dad gave us? Or maybe my 3DS XL. That cost a pretty penny.
107. What’s more valuable: your life or the lives of your loved ones? Would you sacrifice your life for other people? My loved ones. And yes.
108. What is something you value not because it cost a lot, but because it means a lot to you? I have a lot of little items like that. A feather from the turkey Michael brought home for thanksgiving, monster tabs from all those lunch adventures in high school, polished rocks my mom gave me...I'm a sentimental hoarder.
109. If there was a fire in your house/apartment, what is the first thing you would grab? My shoebox of sentimental things.
110. Do you think past memories and experiences are more valuable than what could possibly happen in the future? Well, yes. They make you who you are and you should always remember them and what you learned from them. Maybe they'll even influence future decisions. 

 

 

Countdowns and Plans

COUNTDOWN CLOCK WEBSITE

  I've really been meaning to add one of these sooner, but there's still time to be excited about a countdown! My sister in law has one on her website and has even been our secretary of sorts, letting us know events and keeping track of exactly when we'll be there. When I get excited I make lists, and using our Avocado app we can edit lists together! We probably have five lists related to our vacation and going home. Things to bring in our bags, things to bring for Supai, things to buy, things to do before we leave...It's crazy.
  We will of course be bringing our pets and driving. Three weeks is a long time to be gone and the only person we know and would trust to watch them has plans of her own. But no worries! We've done it before, and not only are they pretty easy to travel with, but our families graciously watch and take care of them for us while we're there.
  I'm just so ready to go. I've saved probably a good 90% of the money I've made working and am still saving. (I haven't quit, things have settled and I'm waiting to see how things go for a while.) I want to make sure this can be a lavish vacation, and I plan on coming back with more than one new tattoo if possible. There are so many things we want to do! Places to go, food to eat, people to see...And my birthday is June 7th! I'm so glad I'll be home to celebrate it.
  As always we'll be leaving as soon as we can. Packing the night before, getting up super super early (like 4 am at least), packing everything into the car and heading out! We always have coffee and snacks at the ready and a fully stocked music collection. We have to stop a few times to get gas of course, and I know we both want to stop at the Welcome To Arizona sign to take some cheesy pictures. It's a fifteen hour drive, most of which is just straight I 40 road. But it's not so bad. It's the drive back that sucks, but I don't want to think about it.

  I can't wait to get back to Supai! We'll only have about a day to relax and get settled before heading out to the canyon. It's gonna be so so good to hang out with some awesome people, hike, tan, swim, and just forget about stupid ugly Oklahoma.
 
    Three weeks!!

More Progress, Work Updates

March to April. Smaller torso, more definition!

   I keep feeling like I'm not getting anywhere lately, because the changes have been smaller, but they're still there, and thanks to these pictures I can see them! This is a much more satisfying form of watching fitness progress than taking measurements and weights. I not only want to look thin but feel strong, and it's obvious I'm getting there. I still have nearly a month left until I go home, which is plenty of time to make another jump in progress just like this one.
  In longer terms, I have made huge leaps of progress just in 2013 alone. If I take the picture on the right and compare it to a few months ago, the result is amazing to me.

January to April

  There I was in January thinking I'd made serious progress then, and I'd made some since I started, yes, but compared to April I was still pretty far away from my goal. Now I'm so close to where I want to be, and so addicted to this lifestyle I think I'll be able to maintain and hopefully never get as unhealthy as I was last year again.

  On a sadder less triumphant note I am already completely miserable at my job and hating it. I know since it's a dead end job and a service job nonetheless, I'm not really supposed to be looking forward to it or liking it a whole lot. But I did when I started. Now, the dramatic atmosphere has only increased, and the chef/manager has decided he has some sort of problem with me and I honestly don't understand why.
  He hired a dishwasher on the spot one day, and only three days went by that they had some kind of confrontation and he fired him. The next day, the kitchen plumbing was flooded. The previously employed dishwasher fully admitted to doing it on purpose, but not before calling a health inspector. The manager doesn't speak great english, and kept asking me to explain things to the inspector. I wasn't even sure what the plumbing problem was, so when he asked me a question about it I didn't fully understand what he was talking about. We have a leak in the dishwashing sinks and water sometimes builds up by the back door. I said so, thinking that was what it was.
  He apparently took this as me trying to make matters worse for him, when I was just trying to be honest and figure out what he was asking. The next day he brought all the waitresses in and said he didn't trust anyone anymore, he doesn't care about anyone's feelings, and made a different waitress the shift leader, a position we've never had before, and flat out said he knew I had seniority over her, but he didn't care.
  I guess he has diabetes, because when he gets extremely moody and ill tempered it's "because of his blood sugar." He blames everything on it and uses it as an excuse to say he can treat us however he wants because he's paying us. I walked out of the "meeting" feeling like I'd been stepped on and dehumanized. I wondered if this was allowed, if other people have gone through this, and how much longer I was supposed to "not let it bother me" (as everyone else told me to do) and continue working for someone so unpredictable and angry.
  Needless to say I think I'll be looking for a different job, one that isn't family owned, with higher ups I can talk to about mistreatment and not be told to just keep my head down. For now, I want to continue earning money. I just have to try to go into work today ignoring this soul crushed sensation in my chest and utter disappointment in the people in this town. 

 

A Cute Little Post About A Cat

The night we took her home.

She was so small and her markings were so light.

Her collar was so big on her!

She was (and is) curious and playful.

Her markings became darker, and she turned spoiled.

But only because we still babied her like a kitten.

Now she's this gorgeous cat, over a year old already!

  Time flies. I kind of miss her being a kitten. It's weird how small she used to be! She doesn't sleep with us like she used to, and she's a bit of a brat, but is still such a sweetheart anyway. Her name is Ramses, but we mostly just call her Kitty. She likes to sit in windows (and ruin our blinds), steal my jewelry from my dresser, chew on plastic, and other mischievous things. But it's so hard to be mad when she is so insistent on cuddling and otherwise begging for attention. Silly thing.